I went to Transformers a few days after the opening to avoid the teenage "fans" that never grew up with the show. I am sure if I went that night, the Wells Fargo parking lot would have been full of parent-purchased cars, Autobot stickers in the rear windows.
I ended up going with my friend Joe, who is also my boss. We sat with an empty seat between us. It was Joe's choice, either because we are both large guys that needed some extra room, or he had a slight homophobic moment. Either way, we were comfortable. He ate brightly colored worms. I drank a Sprite.
Joe doesn't talk much during movies, but makes a lot of confusing hand gesturers. A scene comes up worth commenting on comes up and Joe leans in, holds out a couple fingers, points down, points up, turns his hand. I just nod, hoping that he doesn't bring it up later.
His awkward gesturers were a lot more entertaining than the movie. It was awful. I am a big fan of the cartoon, but I am not usually one to worry too much about inaccuracies. I am concerned with good story telling, and Transformers was full of a lot of bullshit. Cliched teenage romance and secret government agencies are both really tired.
I expected the story to focus on humans, so I hoped to at least enjoy the action. Robots fighting robots has plenty of potential, but the battles were choppier than Batman Begins.
I don't know. I am tired of shitty versions of things that I like, and this was the worst so far.
